How’s that for an introduction?

A colleague recently called me the ‘guru of joy.’ I was a little taken aback by that because for nearly ALL my life, joyful would have been the last word I’d use to describe myself.

Funny and sarcastic, definitely. But joyful? No chance.

Because if you really knew me, you’d know that I had a very unsettled and challenging childhood. Looking back, it’s fair to say I grew up in an emotionally and psychologically unsafe environment.

If you really knew me, you’d know it was me sporting that blue mohawk and combat boots in high school. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, especially at home and at school.

I was angry. Raging, actually. I was pissed off at: Apartheid. Racism. World hunger. Hypocrisy. Animal abuse. Child abuse. Yuppies!

As a teenager, I could very clearly see that the adult world was F-ed up as hell and all those stupid systems that so-called adults worshipped weren’t working.

I was also angry at the systems within my family that I couldn’t escape. Alcoholism. Codependency. Emotional instability. Divorce. I felt powerless and I freakin’ hated it.

Which is why I ran away from home. A few times. And then I graduated high school a year early and ran away legit from the ‘burbs of NYC to find my wings in the City of Angels (LA).

Only I didn’t find wings or angels (though mad props to my own team of guardian angels, without whom I’d be dead 5 times over by now).

Instead, a naïve 17-year-old on scholarship at Occidental College found a deep and pervasive insecurity. I found confusion and a profound sense of not-belonging that traveled with me. And hallelujah, in East LA I found self-destruction on a whole new scale.

But somehow, year over year, despite many bad decisions and downright scary choices, I managed to not die (or end up in jail).

The anger got pushed waaaaaayyy deep down in there, and I began to chill out. I was becoming one of those so-called adults. I dropped out of college nearly as many times as I restarted, but finally got a Bachelors of Fine Art degree at 30.

But through it all the self-loathing persisted. My self-talk was a disaster and I was stuck in perfectionism, which, for an artist is really easy to pass off as “keen attention to detail and craft.”

I was terrified that at some point everyone would find out that I was a hack.

(Just like they found out I was a country bumpkin after moving from rural hippie New Mexico to just outside of New York City when I was 11. Yep, a kid straight up asked me on the school bus if I was a hick. Was it the hand-me-down Wranglers that gave me away? Or my homegrown bowl haircut?)

I never felt talented enough, smart enough, and certainly not pedigreed enough. I doubted everything I did. And of course, I had body issues, even though I look back now on a super svelte, lean, gorgeous bod and just shake my head in wonder.

And because of that not-enoughness, I over-gave, I over-promised, and I sold myself short. For yeeeeaaaarrrsss.

Which was the perfect recipe for disaster. Like clockwork, my life fell apart as soon as I turned 40.

I thought eating right and daily walking was good enough self-care to counteract the daily poison I was feeding myself in the way of self-doubt, self-deprecation and a firmly entrenched belief that I was a high holy piece of shit.

My adrenals thought otherwise, however, and my hormones crashed and burned. I was a mess on the floor for a looonnng time. (Literally on the floor crying, alone, asking God/Spirit/Universe to either heal me or end this suffering.)

I was too ashamed to ask for help and too unworthy to spend money to hire alternative medical doctors. Stuck doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt.

I tried to mask it, but every day I wanted to die. And every day, a barely audible voice said, “Just get through today.”

It took awhile (because I’m super stubborn and thought I had to go it alone – that was my shame with a jigger of internalized white supremacy talking, by the way), but I finally worked with a few folks who got my physical self stabilized.

But it wasn’t until I received energy healing that things started to really shift for me. I had been in therapy on and off for many years, but it was the energy healing that began to heal my abandonment complex and my own worthiness wound.

It can take time to break habits and patterns that don’t serve you, but considering how long I was stuck in limiting patterns, with hindsight I can see now just how quickly my experience began to change.

I had been walking around with a broken heart all my life. No one modeled healthy self-esteem, much less self-love. My worthiness wound made me feel like I was wrong and bad my whole life. No matter how hard I tried to be good or perfect, I could never measure up.

It’s ironic, and then not ironic at all, that I am now guiding others to heal their own worthiness wounds and to embrace and accept all aspects of themselves.

I am so grateful that I crashed and burned because it meant I was able (forced, actually) to create a life for myself that lights me up and fulfills me at a very deep level. A life where joy shines through all my cracks.

In order for me to heal, I had to get it deep into my bones what it means to practice radical self-acceptance, radical self-compassion and radical self-love.

In that very dark period of crying on the floor (aka surrender), I was getting a ‘reorg’ by Spirit. I was downloading and processing a whole new paradigm that was necessary for me to transform my life.

This experience ultimately led to the creation of my signature program, Born To Flourish. I was guided to a framework to help other women heal their trauma and learn to love themselves so they could create lives they really loved, too.

And I didn’t know it when I first launched Born To Flourish that my clients would ultimately create everything they wanted (aka manifest like a mofo) once they healed past trauma and learned to radically love and accept themselves as well.

And so we come full circle to that angry teenager. I’m still angry at the world (but in an empowering way now). Because the world will tell you that you are meaningless unless you consume, unless you have a societally acceptable job, spouse, family, car, etc (which we all internalize subconsciously).

And it’s all a lie. Because you are enough. You matter. You are whole. And you are worthy to receive everything you want, simply by the fact of your birth.

If you are reading this far, you also have a soul’s longing to experience true emotional freedom and the satisfaction that comes from living your soul’s purpose.

And all of that is not only possible for you, Raul, but it is yours to embrace and embody. It is actually why you are here.

If you’ve read this far, I thank you for receiving this story. If any of this resonates with you, I’d love to hear about it. And I want you to know how honored I am to be with you on this journey.

Big Love and Transformation,
Anné

P.S. If you really knew me, you’d also know that my good friend and step-father recently died and I am here writing to you in part because he had the awareness and courage to name the gifts he saw in me. We honor our ancestors (and we become better ancestors) by showing up fully for our soul’s journey. ♥️ ♥️ ♥️

P.P.S. If this resonates because your own past is keeping you stuck in pain and isolation and you KNOW more joy is waiting for you, I invite you to apply for a complimentary Fear To Freedom Breakthrough Call with me. We’ll deep dive together and I’ll share three personalized recommendations to get you out of fear, doubt and stuckness so you can create a life of joy, purpose and belonging. A life you really love.

The post I used to hate myself. appeared first on Anné M. Klint.

For this phase of my life, my body and mind thrive when I consume the following:

• Pure Encapsulations B Complex Plus (with MetaFolin to address DNA and support energy)
• Pure Encapsulations P-5-P 50 (for burning feet and adrenal support)
• NOW L-Tryptophan 500mg (mood and sleep support)
• Premier Research Labs Adaptagen R-3 (hormone and sleep support)
• Arbonne Digestion Plus (probiotics, prebiotics, and digestive enzymes to support proper gut health and function)
• Arbonne Greens Balance (super charges anti-oxidant intake, boosts energy)

I also take Iodine, D3/K2 combo, a sublingual B12 and vitamin C. As needed, I’ll add in magnesium, calcium and GABA. Damn that’s a lot!

Of course, none of this works without consistently eating really healthy meals with tons of veggies and fresh fruits, clean proteins and limited grains. I enjoy fermented foods, bone broth, and green smoothies in addition to what you see above.

I am confident that as I continue to heal my gut, and heal the emotional traumas of my past, my body’s needs will continue to shift and I won’t need to take so many supplements.

And while I know that technically speaking, protein powder is not a supplement, this deserves a Very Honorable Mention. I love and will not go without Arbonne protein powder for the energy it delivers. Arbonne’s clean, soy-free vegan protein absolutely helped my adrenals recover after total burnout and collapse in 2014. I’ve tried a lot of different proteins and this one is the best in term of how it makes my body feel. And it tastes great, too.

I buy most of these supplements from the awesome online retailer www.PureFormulas.com. Create your own free account and get a discount using my referral code: SOQMRHX

I buy the Arbonne products from my own awesome online retailer: www.AnneKlint.arbonne.com. Contact me to shop at a discount.

Happy thriving!

The post Supplements I can’t go without appeared first on Anné M. Klint.

What is this Self-Care thing, you ask? Is it massages and pedicures, spa dates and shopping trips? Did I hear you say it sounds like something for rich folks? Well, you’re only half right. Because there’s so much more to it.

You see, Self-Care is basically any act we intentionally perform whose aim is to provide self-directed care on some basic or not-so-basic physical, emotional, or psychological level. Some Self-Care is habit by now, or at least I hope it is, like brushing your teeth everyday.

Brush yer grillz!

We’re all taught on some level to care for others first. Women as nurturers, men as bread-winners (I’m generalizing, of course – hats off to the nurturing bread-winners of any gender). But that usually means that we put others’ needs before our own. Even our animal friends seem to eat better than we do, and on a regular schedule to boot!

The physical realm is the easiest for me personally to navigate. We all know how to tend wounds, shower, and exercise (even if we don’t do it). But I want to talk about the other stuff, too, because my ignorance of and disregard for a self-focused nurturing practice left me completely and wildly burned out with adrenal fatigue two and a half years ago. What I see now, but couldn’t fathom then, was how important Self-Care is to our health; physical, emotional, and psychological.

Since my burnout, I’ve gotten pretty darn good at listening to my body, maybe even too good. Well beyond recognizing when I’m hungry, tired, and thirsty, I’ve learned how to supplement for energy, better sleep, and balanced hormones and mood. I prepare meals that not only satisfy, but also nourish and heal my adrenals. I’ve even gotten out of my comfort zone and started using really nice skincare. Every now and again, I buy myself something that’s just for me. These are all physical means of nurturing the self.

However, I’m still not so great at the other aspects of Self-Care. Examples of emotional Self-Care would be listening to your inner voice that tells you when a situation feels good, or doesn’t, and taking appropriate action to feel emotionally safe or confident. Another example is fulfilling our need for shared connection. A third would be living with integrity and standing in your power, even when it feels risky or just plain hard to do. (How do we get there, I hear you asking? Read on!)

When it comes to psychological Self-Care, I may have a slightly better handle on it. In fact, instead of sitting down to write this earlier today, I decided I’d rather tackle a few very dusty piles of paperwork in my office that had been nagging at me for many months. With a clear head, I was easily able to recycle nearly all of it, and file away most of the rest. I wasn’t sure if I was merely procrastinating, or if I was getting something off my to-do list that was seriously cramping my “head space.” That act of double Self-Care (crossing something off the list and creating a more visually appealing surround) most definitely created a bit of mental fresh air.

Self-Care can be different for everyone. Sure, as humans, we all share the same basic needs, but how we meet those needs will be up to you. The important part is to Nike that sh*t. Just do it. Start small. Build up. Make new habits.

And love yourself, like you’re all you’ve got.

This was a fun and helpful way to look at Self-Care: You Feel Like Shit: An Interactive Self-Care Guide

And for even more Bay Area fun, join my MeetUp group. We picnic, hike, color, blow bubbles, meditate at the beach, and discuss Self-Care strategies while engaging in Self-Care activities. It’s free!

Easy Tips For Physical Self-Care:

Breathe!

Check in with your body each morning. Sit quietly for 5 minutes and focus on your breath. Let your thoughts come and go. Don’t micromanage them.

Check in throughout the day. Ask yourself, am I thirsty? Good chance you are. Drink some water. It’s not rocket science.

On the flip side, check in as you are eating. Stop eating the moment you start to feel full. Worried about Catholic, Jewish, or starving-kids-in-Ethiopia guilt? Save unfinished bites for later, when you are hungry again.

Clean Plate Club!

News cycle got you down? Turn it off! All of it. Don’t worry, it will still be there when you come back.

Feeling super stressed out in traffic? Did some A-hole just cut you off? Why is that person driving so ever loving SLOWLY? See first option above.

Check in with your body. Are you feeling stiff, achy, or sore? Move that old bod of yours. We were designed for movement, gosh darn it. So get your groove on, go for a walk, fly a kite, have sex. Stretch, bend, fold, roll, whatever it takes. Nike it.

“It rubs the lotion on it’s back.” Do something nice for yourself. Bubble bath, massage, lotion up. Paint your toenails. Even if you’re a dude. Or…especially if you’re a dude.

Easy Tips For Emotional Self-Care:

Gratitude journal.

Keep a small notebook of everything you are grateful for. This sounds super corny, I know. But trust me, this works. Or, each night as you drift off to sleep, recount three things you are grateful for that day. Start each day with three grateful events you anticipate coming true. The fact that you are alive counts as one!

Keep a running list of everything you like about yourself in a small notebook. The entries don’t even need to be true. They can be things you would simply like to think about yourself!

i-heart-me

Check in with yourself. How do you feel after spending time with someone? Are you energized, brimming with love, or feeling drained? Spend your time and energy in ways and with people who fill you up.

Allow your feelings.

When negatives emotions come up, don’t push them away. (What we resist, persists.) Get curious. Ask yourself where and when you felt this way before. Go deeper. Thank those emotions for keeping you safe and alive until now and tell them you don’t need them anymore. Decide how you’d rather feel and imagine yourself feeling that way! Yes, I know what you are thinking, but neuroscience says this works!

Smile and say hello to strangers! If they smile back, major bonus!

Practice receiving.

Hold both ends of the giving stick. If you are always giving, start receiving for a change (I know that can feel really uncomfortable). If you are always receiving, do some giving. If we all gave, there’d be no one to receive, you see? We need to practice both to be whole.

Easy Tips For Psychological Self-Care:

Change things up.

Take a new route to work, or to the grocery store. Making new neural networks keeps your experience on this planet fresh and alive.

Clean up your self talk.

If someone talked to me the way I have often talked to myself, I’d probably have punched ‘em right in the kisser. If you can’t clean it up using the Get Curious method above, get some help. A simple diet change, or tryptophan, or counseling can make a big difference here. Ask me how!

It’s not a big deal.

Failure. Everyone does it. Keep going. Keep the self-criticism in check. See above.

Friends. Cherish them.

Make new ones. Cultivate relationships like you would a garden upon whose bounty your life depended. Ask for help when you need it and you’ll find people actually want to help you! Offer it when you think they do.

Say NO.

You don’t have to do everything all the time. Give yourself a break already. Spreading yourself thin shortchanges you and everyone else. Listen to the subtle cues your body is telling you before you over-commit.  *Note to self: You don’t need to save the entire world.

De-Clutter.

Clean it up. It weighs on your mind, nagging at you. Set aside a short amount of time every week to tackle a small area. Little by little, organizing will become a habit, and you won’t feel overwhelmed trying to do it all at once. Hire help if you need to.

Help me!

To-Do Lists.

Be real. Is everything on your list really a priority? Chunk it down into two lists; one for today (or this week) and one for the future. Put the future list away and after prioritizing the today list, decide what you can do immediately. And then do it. Don’t let the list be a noose around your neck.

Remember, you don’t have to do everything all at once. Pick one thing and start today. Add more once that intention becomes habit.

Shine on, beautiful people!

And by golly, love yourself! Because you’re awesome when you let your light shine.

What are your strategies for Self-Care? I wanna know in the box below!

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